December 3, 2014
Every relationship with high mileage of 10, 25 or 40 plus years is an amazing journey where a couple experiences both the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. Sometimes couples want to give up, but they don’t, and that is the secret of their relationship. Those who persevere will eventually hit a place where they enjoy the “sweet savor” of successful marriage. Sure they still “have words” at times but there is this wonderful relational fabric woven of time, commitment, shared experiences, and love that is worth everything it took to get them to this place.
Couples who do not give into discouraging moments, points of disillusionment or frustration and anger have chosen to make the problems along the way into building blocks that strengthened their relationship. They do not give up on the relationship in the painful moment. These couples will grow old together and learn to cherish the moments and memories.
According to Waite and Gallagher in the Case for Marriage, there are significant benefits for those that do not give up. Married people:
- Live longer than those divorced or single.
- Have more sex and better sex. (Sure makes living longer more fun!)
- Experience a lower level of depression and a higher overall happiness in life.
- Get paid more and have better financial stability.
- Give their children a more secure foundation from which to launch their lives.
Action: Reflect on one or two obstacles or impediments in your relationship that makes you feel discouraged and think about giving up. Identify them and come up with a plan on how to address them as a couple. Affirm your commitment to each other and desire to grow old together!
Resource: The Case for Marriage: Why Married People are Happier, Healthier and Better off Financially by Linda J. Waite and Maggie Gallagher
Read More: Marriage: Little Things Add Up