April 15, 2015
If we were the same, one of us would not be necessary! Two people who are different have the wonderful potential of complementing each other, but will also have conflict. Conflict is normal and can be very productive. Constructive conflict which can be defined as solution focused and not person focused can build depth into any relationship. Many couples miss out on the benefits of conflict by either being too passive or too aggressive. A common pattern of conflict mismanagement is to withdraw or attack. Learn to engage in a positive way! You engage when you trust the other person and depth of the relationship to handle the conflict. So go have a “good” fight!
Action: When you notice conflict brewing, don’t withdraw or become aggressive. Engage with this question, “What’s a win/win solution for this issue?” Do not give up till you both agree on a plan.
Proverb of Solomon: “The mind of the wise makes their speech insightful and enhances the teaching of their lips. Pleasant words are flowing honey, sweet to the taste and healing to the bones.”
– Proverbs 16: 23-24 CEB